by Trista di Genova

If you are like me, you are trying to learn Chinese, the REAL spoken-in-the-streets kind of Chinese. But all your Chinese-speakin’ friends won’t answer your questions about how to say all the important stuff, because they don’t want to teach you ‘Bad Chinese’! (Of course, THEY want to learn all the bad words in English!)

I have a few truly cool Taiwanese friends, however, who will give me a straight answer, and I’ve compiled an introductory lesson here on all the most useful down-and-dirty words we’d all like to know!

你有病啊? Ni yo bing, ah? — ARE YOU CRAZY?
放輕鬆! fang ching song! — RELAX!
氣死我了! Chi-se wo le! — YOU’RE PISSING ME OFF
我要抱怨 Wo yao bao-yuan — I WANT TO COMPLAIN
不要吵! Bu yao chao! — CUT IT OUT!
妓女 Ji – nu — WHORE
三八婆 san ba po(3) — BITCH
你想打我? Ni xiang da wo? — WANNA FIGHT?
你飛了啊! Ni fei(4) le, ah! — YOU’RE VERY LUCKY!
踩狗屎 Zai go shi 3– TO STEP IN DOGSHIT
下流! Xia lio! — SON OF A BITCH
好興奮 Hao xing fun — EXCITED
妓男 ji nan – GIGOLO
懂嗎? dong ma? — UNDERSTAND?
延遲 Yan(2)-chi(2) or Zhi(1) neng(3) chi(2) huan de — RETARD
huang-min de — RIDICULOUS
shi-hao wo — SERVICE ME
Mingbai de meo? — CLEAR?
Qu kan yi-sha — GO CHECK IT OUT
Bu yao pong wo — DON’T TOUCH ME
Wo bu zai hu — I DON’T CARE
Wo bu jong ju-le — I HAVE NO IDEA
Gan she-ma! — WHAT THE HELL!?
Hai ke-yi — PRETTY GOOD
Jie-guo — LET ME PASS
Gwan — SCRAM
Nide dongxi ban-kai — MOVE YOUR STUFF
Chien-xi — FOREPLAY

This warms me heart for some reason.