Chinese Communist Party (CCP) General-Secretary, and Chairman of the Central Military Commission (CMC), Xi Jinping, currently standing as the highest-ranking official in China, approved of a sarcophagus presented to him today, February 15, 2020, as senior officials, also wearing surgical masks, sat in front of microphones and bent forward while scribbling with pens.

I approve of this sarcophagus, Xi muffled through his surgical mask, and his scribbling toadies offered muffled cheers in reply.

Qin Shi Huang, may have had an army of terracotta warriors, but I have you, Xi muffled through his surgical mask, while speaking to the assembled bureaucrats.

Unlike other great world leaders, long past, Xi’s legacy will be a sarcophagus in the form of a long desk, with the corpse of the great leader in the center, and toadying nannipoops wearing surgical masks, assembled either side in front of microphones.

The memorial, unveiled for the first time in the world’s oldest civilization, will be unique, and stand for all time.